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Letter to my people: You can run, but you can’t hide

President Emmerson Mnangagwa and VP Constantino Chiwenga

My Dear People

There is nothing I would have loved more this week than to wish my fellow Zimbabweans a happy 43rd Independence anniversary.

 However, any chance of celebratory independence commemorations disappeared with the tanks and guns that removed Gushungo and ushered in the dispensation of poverty, darkness and confusion led by the probity deficient Ngwena in that dark year of 2017.

Since then the country has stumbled from one crisis to another.

From the killing of citizens by soldiers when they carried out protests to the increased levels of poverty brought about by the decision by Ngwena’s regime to reintroduce the Zimbabwe dollar without the benchmarks to support it, the country has become one of the unhappiest places to reside in according to the global Happiness Index.

The premature excitement, brought about by the coup almost six years ago, dissipated faster than morning dew in the sweltering sun after the country's citizens realised that the promise of a democratic nation by Ngwena was a load of hot air.

If anything the country is now being run by a dictatorship that clamps down on demonstrations held by even just two individuals as evidenced by the arrest and conviction of prominent author Tsitsi Dangarembga and Julie Barnes for allegedly inciting violence in 2020 when they held a demonstration in which they simply held up a placard calling for better reforms.

Such is the ridiculous levels of autocracy that the Generari revealed recently that the regime is looking to criminalise the employment of the country’s health professionals by other countries.

This is the definition of independence by Ngwena and his cabal.

Munopenga!!!

If anything the country has now become a banana republic far removed from any notions of independence.

Still on the issue of independence, we had Joji frothing about the editorial comment by our sister paper NewsDay on the need to address the alarming levels of corruption in the country if independence commemorations were to be relevant.

He went on a tirade pointing out that  Ngwena could not prioritise what he called a fictional Al Jazeera documentary.

In what is a classic illustration of the confusion that permeates the halls of Ngwena’s regime, as Joji dismissed the Al Jazeera exposè, the bank accounts of those exposed in the investigation such as Uebert Angel aka Uebert Mudzanire were being frozen on the basis of the exposé amid an undertaking from the same government to investigate its findings.

It is almost as if the right hand of Ngwena’s regime has no clue what the left hand is doing.

It is frightening to think that it is these clueless bozos that are mandated with the responsibility of running the country.

It is little wonder that the country has become an economic backwater and a global laughing stock.

Talking of independence celebrations, I was happy to see Joyce joining the cabal in Mt Darwin and the plastic smiles from vene vayo.

In a show for the cameras, Dr Amai 11 leapt from her seat to give poor Runaida a bear hug before Ngwena and Oppah followed suit.

The Generari, with his latest trophy wife in tow, was restrained as he only offered the one who single handedly downed a Rhodesian fighter jet a mere handshake. 

A lesson for you from that episode is that you can never trust politicians. 

Do you still remember all those characters cheering me on as I took Runaida down with all those crazy allegations that she was a witch, who wanted to kill Gushungo?  Kikikiki

Munopengaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Local Government minister July has been uttering hogwash this week.

While this is not new when it comes to this fellow, the nonsense spewed only seems to get worse.

In an interview with a weekly paper, he revealed that the latest brainfade his ministry has come up with is to ensure that all councillors have a tertiary qualification.

Without any sense of shame, he claimed a shortage of educated people in council chambers had brought about the mess in Harare.

Unopengaaaa !!!

This ghastly tripe is the reason why the country is in this mess.

If education was the panacea for the country's ills then surely this country would be right up there competing with first world countries such as the United Kingdom and the United States.

 But alas despite having a government led by someone who claims to be a lawyer by profession and with even one or two professors in the cabinet, the country is in an advanced state of decay.

Under Finance minister Mthuli who is also a learned professor, the country's inflation has soared to more than 800% at one point under his watch severely eroding incomes and impoverishing the vast majority of the country's citizens.

It is also under his watch that the local currency is losing value on a daily basis such that government has to pay part of  its workers salaries in hard currency.

So much for sovereignty kkkkk.

It is this same government that came up with the preposterous move of fixing a dumpsite in Pomona in partnership with a dubious foreign company that would cost ratepayers thousands of dollars in the scarce foreign currency daily. 

Indeed July has almost honed talking nonsense skills into a fine art.

Meanwhile, council of chiefs president Fortune Charumbira cannot seem to stop getting himself into trouble.

After having being censored by the High Court for being partisan in support of Zanu PF which is a violation of the country's constitution, he is now under investigation for having allegedly fondled his married niece in an embarrassing accusation of incest.

Charumbira’s fortunes (no pun intended) or lack thereof represent everything a chief should not be and it’s a travesty that it is such characters, who represent the country at the Pan African Parliament.

Finally, I cannot sign off this missive without saying something about the Gold Mafia.

As usual, Ngwena and his Lacoste gang thought they would get away with murder as they often do, but they forgot that their false ‘profit’ is a British citizen.

I gather some naughty British lawmakers are itching to ask their government very tricky questions about the Gold Mafia as far as it relates to their citizen.

I assure you, skeletons are about to fall from some very important closets.

As they say: You can run, but you can’t hide.

 Munopengaaaa

Gushungo chete chete

Dr Amai Stop it! PhD (Fake)

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